Home > Uncategorized > A very awesome 50th post

A very awesome 50th post

That’s right, kiddos, we’ve reached the big time here. The show. I believe the French call it ‘merde sainte ceci est impressionnante’. No more messing around with that free crap over at wordpress.com, I’m now using widgets and themes provided by the infinitely superior wordpress.org. How do I know it’s superior, and infinitely so at that? Because I have to pay for the privilege to use it, that’s how.

This is only step one in my plan for world domination (in the blogging sense). It might seems old hat to reveal my secret and super awesome plan to you right now, but you’re powerless to stop me. I’m like that avalanche in XxX, only this time Vin Diesel doesn’t have a snowboard. Here we go:

  1. Get a personal website
  2. ???
  3. PROFIT!
  4. ???
  5. World domination (in the blogging sense)

As you can see, I’ve already passed the hardest step. The rest should really take care of itself. I’ve already ordered a case of Dom and a bevy of phat booty’d young women (or “bitches” if you want to be vulgar) to prepare for the inevitable pimp-living. Yes, impending pimpdom is a mere four steps away, but there are a few obstacles.

I need to go back and tweak a couple of posts. For some reason youtube embedding is different between the two formats, and I’m sure there will be other surprises along the way. The new theme is nice, but I’m not sure if I’m a hundred percent happy with it. I do really like the customizable header. The image up there is an excerpt of a picture called ‘The life cycle of stars‘ provided by the nice folks at hubblesite.org. Actually I’m not sure if they’re nice, or if they’re even folks. The site could be run by a bunch of robots, mean little bastard robots, but the site in and of itself is awesome. The site doesn’t load or scroll as fast as I’d like it to. I’m not sure if that’s the sites fault or because I have a lot of GIGANTIC images on the page. There’s a lot I’ll need to get used to. Luckily, the wordpress forums are filled with lots of people who have already asked all the questions that I have. Just one more way that I’m stepping on the heads of competitors on my way to world domination (in the blogging sense). Their hard work is allowing me to be lazy about this. I appreciate that. It almost makes me feel bad that soon they will be slave to my awesome supremeness (in the blogging sense).

The one thing I’m most excited about is the ability to upload audio files. How, why, and when I’ll use this newfound ability, nay, newfound power, I don’t know…yet. Regardless, I’m sure the whole process will lead to thoughts of regret, failure, suicide and ultimately satisfaction. Everything so far has been a bit harder than I expected. I sometimes feel like Scotty in Star Trek IV when he’s trying to use the mouse to talk into the computer.

I’ll try not to let my any of this go to my head, though. You can take comfort in the fact that I’ll still be offering you the most awesomely wonderful and hilariously funny blogging this side of badhairday.

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. March 24, 2010 at 10:50 pm

    World Domination is always good. But I prefer profit.

    • DJ
      March 25, 2010 at 1:49 pm

      That’s the beauty of my plan. I get both.

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